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Lost in Tulgey Wood

"I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge." J.R.R. Tolkein

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Location: Canton, Ohio, United States

The essence of all art is to have pleasure in giving pleasure --Mikhail Baryshnikov

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Oh, Mickey, You're So Fine...

Leave it to Doc to know what to do when I lose my shit. We're all sick at my house and the night before last, Lucy had a particularly rough night. And if Lucy ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. We were up with her from 2:00 a.m. to about 5:30 a.m. By about 5:15 a.m., I was ready to start pulling people's heads off with my bare hands while chewing roofing nails.

"My chest hurts," I said, fuming on the couch. I think I was having an anxiety attack. Beyond being stressed out from lack of sleep, I had had a few other high stress moments this week. Doc left the room and returned, holding out a teaspoon.

"Here's some cough syrup; maybe it will help you feel better."

I took it and stretched out on the couch with the still-wide awake Lucy. Eventually, she and I both conked out. I woke up at about 12:30 p.m. feeling much better. I was rested and my chest no longer hurt. I still felt like crap from this dang cold, but attitude-wise: much better.

Later that night, after we got the girls to bed Doc and I were talking. I was apologizing for being so cranky and thanked him for letting me sleep that morning; it had really made a difference.

"Well," he said, "That cough syrup I gave you? I crushed up half a Xanax in it. I thought you needed it and I wasn't sure you'd take it."

I must say I was momentarily stunned. Should I be angry that he slipped me a Mickey? Should I feel stupid that he tricked me? No. Once again, he did what was best for me without asking my permission first. I like this take-charge attitude from him every now and then. He doesn't trot it out very often, but when he does, he's swift and stealthy and he's usually right to have done it.

I was beyond rational thought that night. I was also having a panic attack. I probably would have taken the Xanax willingly, but, as I'm sure Doc already figured, I would have felt guilty about it. By slipping it to me on the sly, he gave me several hours of rest in a row that I desperately needed and let me off the hook with my over-active conscience.

You may disagree that it was the right thing to do, in these litigious days, Alice, but I'm glad he did it. Sometimes we must look after others. Sometimes we need looking after, whether we like it or not.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Drinkin' Don't Mix with Me

Never was much of a drinker myself, Alice. In high school, I didn't drink because I was in the band and I believed that you didn't have to get drunk to have fun. I still believe that, actually.

I tried drinking in college. It was fun, somewhat. I still didn't like feeling out of control. The control freak in me kept that kind of thing in check. Besides, I always get overheated when I drink most kinds of alcohol. The experience is overall uncomfortable.

So, I guess I don't know why it appeals so much to some people. Maybe you know. Maybe you can tell me, Alice, why some people drink until they stagger their steps and slur their speech? Does alcohol just taste that good that they drink it so fast they get drunk before they know it? Are they trying to kill themselves? Are they trying to stop their brains thinking?

I'd sure like to know.

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